The eastern gray squirrel (Sciurus carolinensis) is not a bird. Yet, this one happily dines daily from Rita’s bird feeder attached to our kitchen window with suction cups. And by daily I mean constantly.
Weeks ago, this particular eastern gray would be interrupted from his dining enjoyment whenever Rita or I walked into the kitchen. And by interrupted I mean he would leap comedically from his perch.
But recently, our furry friend has realized the humans inside are powerless to cause him harm inspiring him to become mockingly fearless. Which means I can actually get quite close to the little bugger. And by close I mean four inches away and he doesn’t even blink.
Just to confirm, the three suction cups keep the $18 bird feeder attached securely to the glass whenever God’s creatures munch on the seed and corn. And by God’s creatures I mean cardinals, sparrows, and wrens.
(Contrarily, squirrels — obviously one of Satan’s creatures — tend to knock the $18 bird feeders off the glass shattering them on the brick patio which has so far cost me $54.)
Even though actual birds are all too scared to approach the bird feeder, Rita insists on replacing the plexiglass contraption and filling it with bird seed. And by bird seed I mean squirrel food.
All that to say the Payleitners will be having squirrel for Thanksgiving. And by having I mean feeding.